Saw one of my friends' post in Facebook. She had recently got married, and well, kinda envy of her. Haha! But what makes me really sad is that up till now, it had been weeks since my gf and I had met. Well, she is bust, I know... Although we are meeting this weekend, cos she need to collect something that she bought online. I could say, this is one of the rarest opportunity that we can meet. I also envy of couples who can chat on phone, hear each other's voices, and just by listening to their voices, you could feel they are nearby. As for me, to be able to meet is already difficult, not to mention to chat on phone at night.

Now, I am beginning to understand why people in the audit professions said this, "An auditor can only be with an auditor." I mean, who has that patience to be able to withstand such long period of loneliness, and furthermore, can't date openly due to parental factors. Who in the right mind will be able to withstand such torture? Well, I am exceptional, and I am that crazy person. I don't know why, but my heart just wouldn't want to let go. For me, is heart over mind, since I am considered to be an emotional person. I chose to withstand this loneliness, than to hurt someone. I just couldn't bear to see her sad. Many things had happened in camp recently, and she is not there when I needed her. I mean... I just don't want to burden her further with my situations. Her work is important, and she needs to tackle her studies. Like what I had always told her, I do not want to pressurize her anymore. So where does all the pressure goes to? Me!

Back to the topic about knowing one of my friends' recent marriage. I had been talking and discussing with her about this topic since don't know when. In my inner self, I seems to feel that marriage is the only idea for both of us to be close together, and does not need to go through the pain of missing one another. Of course, I know it is impossible for now cos well, she has her target that she want to achieve. And me? I guess I can just simply wait for her. I guess this is also one reason why I really envy those who are married to one another.

DarKnight @ 9:42 PM